DOGOPHOBIA (1)

Okay, I know I’m not supposed to begin like this, but it is how I feel presently. 

Maybe it will change in the next twenty one days, who knows? 

Two days ago, I was relaxing, thinking how beautiful my day was going. Then, I heard a dog bark. There’s a dog in this compound, I thought as I sat up immediately. As if answering my questions the dog barked again. This time, it was very loud.

 
When I asked my brother, Tobi, he said it was our new neighbour’s dog. Of course, who else? I wondered.
This compound has been very quiet and peaceful. Even the next compound, they don’t have dogs. And then, our new neighbour came and gbam! No peace again! 

When they first came to the compound, they came with a puppy (I know some of you are already saying ‘so cute’. #Rollmyeyes) and a very mighty cage. I did not even know this one time until I was going to dry my clothes and I saw ‘shit’ on the floor. Just where my window was! Can you imagine? Who in hell did this? The next thing on my mind was, “No! There’s a dog!” 

You needed to see the way I was looking around as I was drying my clothes. I’m not sure I pegged it and ran inside to meet my cousin.

“Somebody has a dog in this compound. I don’t know who ooo, and the dog’s shit is outside. I am not packing anything ooo.”

“Ohh! It’s for our new neighbour. We’ll tell the gateman to let them know. Don’t pack it,” she said calmly. Before nko?

 
I was going out to buy something later that day when I saw the puppy running after me. My heart just froze. I don’t know what entered me because I just stamped my feet angrily on the floor and shouted. The puppy ran away ooo. I felt like a heroine! 

Suddenly, I saw the puppy and the cage was gone. And I was like, Thank you, Lord. Only for me to see this mighty bulldozer two days ago. I still cannot believe it. Why? So, puppy did not work, it’s mighty one you decided to bring? I felt like asking my neighbour and his wife. 

I didn’t remember it again until I was about to pack my clothes I had washed earlier in the day. They put the dog at the backyard, chained to one of the railings. The compound is a building comprising of flats, so you know how close these houses are somehow. The dog was still allowed to move from one point to another. And that ‘another’ is close to our side, where the washing machine is. Lord, why me? 

I got out and the dog greeted me with a bark. I had forgotten about the dog and almost fell down. If you see the way I glued myself to the wall and gently passed while the dog kept barking ehhhnnn, if my thoughts could kill the dog then, it would have been dead already. I swear!

I packed my clothes, but I did not pass the back door again ooo. I went in through the front door. Don’t come and spoil my fine girl for me. 

I was angry with my neighbours for having a dog. I am still angry. But it seems this dog is here to stay ooo. 

Alright, I think you can also say I am afraid of dogs too. You are not wrong at all. Here’s why: Growing up in Warri, I see many dogs ooo. Most people who have not fed themselves, and still have dogs. So you can tell how malnourished the dogs would be looking. And those dogs would be looking at you angrily (I mean, you are ‘flesh’ and they are not being fed meat in their owners’ houses. So, maybe they want a piece of you. That’s what I thought anyway.) If they pursue you, you have to run. Dem nor born you make you nor run. Those dogs nor get joy at all. All those dogs that look skinny and carry rabies upandan. Shey you can relate? Or you can’t? 

Of all the dogs I saw in Warri, only one family really had dogs that they took care of. I mean the way ‘oyinbo people’ take care of their pets; take them to hospitals regularly, feed them correct meat and food (nothing like leftovers ooo) etc. When one of the dogs bit someone then, there was really no cause for alarm because they were well treated. No rabies wahala. 

So, there’s this compound we used to go to fetch drinking water. They had pumping machine and we had well in ours. They were our church members and my mum would ask us to go there to fetch water. I hated going there. The dogs were the reason. Once they see a stranger, they will bark their lives out. I don’t go inside until one of the children comes to walk with me ooo. Even with that person, I’ll still be scared. 

Then one day, one of the dogs really had it in for me. I can’t really remember how it happened again. But it chased me. I ran, brethren. (This race is second to my running when a mad man chased me. Story for another day. Don’t you dare laugh at me ooo!) It got so close to me that I could feel its cold nose (or is it it’s breath?) on my leg. 

One of the children came to rescue me. I almost died that day. They way my heart was beating ehhhnnn…..Fada Lawd!

Prior to this, one of the dogs had bitten a mad woman and she had rabies. So, all I was thinking then as I ran was, “God, save me ooo. I nor want rabies ooo. What if that madness of that woman still dey inside the dog? I don’t want to run maaaaaaaad!”

My Father in heaven who does not sleep nor slumber answered my prayers ooo. 

So, since then, my fear and hatred for dogs increased times millions. 

Now, this dog is here. I just hope this crazy thought I have will really work.

(To be continued)